Have you been in the DRC very long? Do you struggle with the culture? What culture exactly?

It is a bit of shock if you haven’t been here long or when you arrive in the beginning.

For people from Europe, North America, Asia or other African nations, some things here can be a bit of shock. Maybe the local behaviour originates from colonial times, just very ancient local customs, a lack of education, patriarchal society, extreme poverty, wars, survival tactics or other reasons! Who knows the origins but there are things that you see or hear in DRC that can just shock you in a good or in a bad way!

I’ll go through a few that still surprise me, even after 20 years here.

There are a lot of generalisations here so be aware that it is not always the case.

• As a foreigner (or a visible minority), you get the very common “Bonjour” greeting from random people on the street. It’s apparently rude not to greet everyone when you enter a room. Even as you enter an elevator, it is good manners to greet everyone!
• People speak rather loudly to each other. Soft spoken people are hard to find. Just go on the street and you’ll hear people laughing and joking with one another. There is a collegial attitude when talking to one another on the street. Not in offices though!
• Religion is very important. Believing in a God is very important. An atheist is almost considered a demon or an untrustworthy person here.
• Don’t wait for your turn in a queue, you need to push your way to the front here. Waiting in line is sometimes futile. Read the room. If people are all glued to the desk, you might also need to do it.
• You’re always being watched in public. Staring and smiling back depends on the vibe the other person is giving.
• If you leave the window of your car slightly open, it has occasionally been the case that someone will quickly grab your phone (petty theft happens in certain places of heavy traffic or congestion)
• It takes a lot of patience to live here. Things move slowly. People will take their time to respond. For example, go to a restaurant and you will find that service is often painfully slow but can be very friendly.
• Traffic is horrible. If you have read my blog before, I complain a lot about it. Nobody gives you an inch, you need to be forceful and push yourself forward. Cops are always trying to trick drivers into paying ridiculous fines. Try to move very early or very late. Saturdays and sundays are not bad.
• Avoid large crowds. Try to stay in open areas with many exists. It can get a bit hectic and chaotic.
• Avoid talking politics. Don’t take sides. Ask what people think but don’t give your opinion.
• Cops on the road almost always look for a stupid chump that follows the rules. Stop at a red light (only do this on the boulevard) or try to be funny (going straight on a turning lane supposedly, or encroaching on a pedestrian crossing, etc…), you’ll get asked for your licence and kept with the cops until you cough up a few bucks. Don’t expect a receipt. Just a smile from them that says that you’ve made their day. Sometimes you’ll get lucky and all they will ask is “coffee please”. There are a few that actually just do their job like at the Citybank/Chantilly intersection.

• While at a red light, kids, beggars and disabled people ask for change all day and night everywhere in town (2023) – give them 500 or 1000 FC if you want
• Everyone uses the same greeting “Hello boss” “Bonjour patron”. Hierarchy is extremely important. Wearing nice clothes and sunglasses means you are important. Look like the average Joe and no one will care. You must look important. Wear a three piece suit. Don’t touch your car door. A security guard will open it for you. I’m obviously joking (partially) but security guards will insist to open the door for you for a buck or two.
• When you park on the street, always give 1000 FC or 2000 FC to the security guard. If you don’t, they’ll hate you. Never say no. Say “Lobi” which means tomorrow (and yesterday!). Don’t kill their hope! Everyone expects a little change for every favour they do for you (even when you don’t ask for one). A prime example is when you land at the airport. There are porters who insist to push your cart. You have to insist heavily for them to leave you alone.
• If you go to a local market, be very tough but friendly. It can get very hairy when all you want to do is look at the goods quietly.
• Learn a few words of Lingala and smile when you say no. It will help you a lot and make people happy: “Mbote, hello. Sango nini, what’s new? Sango eza te, no news.”
• Everyone says “Mister” followed by your first name. Your last name doesn’t matter. M. Emilio. M. Jean. Forget about explaining that it’s M. followed by your last name. That doesn’t work here. We use “Maman” Marie or “Papa” Luc as a sign of respect. Say “Coco” if they are elderly.
• If you’re a woman on her own, I’m told harassement is somewhat common on the street or in other public spaces.
• People are mostly cheerful and playful. Most are willing to chat, some only in Lingala. Some will be in a bad mood. I guess it’s like everywhere but people are somewhat nicer here than elsewhere in the world.
• The use of the horn is obligatory. Cars won’t drive 5 min without using it.
• Littering is normal. Plastic bags and bottles are thrown everywhere willy-nilly. Kinshasa has become horribly dirty lately. There is a cleanup project called Kinshasa Bopeto but it seems to have failed in most parts of the city.
• Congolese employees or friends that make a good living seem to have a lot of responsibility too. Friends and family of theirs keep coming to them for financial aid. They take out loans. Have to pay out of pocket for healthcare expenses that are overpriced and mediocre. There are always funerals, births, mariages, tragedies, robberies, you name it, it can happen here.

• Punctuality is extremely rare. 15 min can turn into 2 hours. Especially at weddings. If you’re invited to a wedding at 8pm, don’t show up before 11pm.
• Titles are very important. Respect and understand who’s above you. Don’t assume they want to be called by their first name.
• As a foreigner, you’re expected to be richer and so you must pay for everyone’s drinks and food when you go out with Congolese (I’ve never been asked if we should split the bill).
• There are two economies in Congo. One in dollars where everything is overpriced by 2 or 3. An average meal in a normal restaurant by western standard can cost 50$ per person! And the other economy in francs, where everything is very very cheap : fruits, drinks, meals, transportation. A middle class is quasi non existent.
• Trusting low paid workers with financial responsibilities is very hard, as it obviously sounds. Theft and corruption is very common. If you send someone to buy something, maybe they’ll add a dollar and tell you it costs that extra dollar and keep it. People also ask for cash for favours. There’s an expectation to share your earnings with those who helped you if it is their job. Cheating their bosses is quite common. Foreign companies here will hire other foreigners just to watch that no one steals (Go into any supermarket, you’ll see a foreigner just standing behind the cashiers). If you find a trustworthy and loyal person here, keep them and reward them profusely. Due to the hardships of daily life and rising costs, stealing is a strong temptation.
• Be very careful when working for or with politically connected people. Try not to get on their bad side. They wield power beyond what you think they have. Influence and who you know plays a big role in handling conflicts. It’s not always the one that’s right that wins a fight! Courtrooms can be very dangerous places even if you think you’re right. You may even end up in prison if someone really dislikes you!
• Equality or collaboration in the workplace is harder here than elsewhere. The culture is that the boss decides and you should do as you’re told. If you have a good idea, don’t say it, is the reflex.

Do you agree or disagree with these thoughts? Why not?

Have I forgotten some?

Please share them.

This list may come across as offensive. I apologise. It is not my intention. If I am wrong or your experience has been very different please share them with me.

Living here as a foreigner and growing up here makes you acutely aware how lucky you are. There are people with such hard lives here that you cannot help but feel hate and sorry that their world is so tough compared to yours. “Cry me a river” you might say. Yes. Guilt accompanies you everywhere here. When you’ve had a nice big meal and someone walks up to you starving, or you drive home and a homeless person is sleeping on your driveway, what else can you feel?

Congo can make you hard and insensitive but it might also soften you too much. Have you found a balance? Tell me about it 🙂